Cancer Sucks! (Ashley)

I just want to clarify for everyone that this experience is NOTHING like Grey's Anatomy. Although they are working there hardest to get things moving for our baby girl, it definitely is a MUCH slower process than what they show on TV.

We have been introduced to many amazing doctors, specialists, nurses and staff. We are very blessed to be working with these talented and brilliant people. They have made this journey as smooth as possible for us (not that it has been any where near smooth) and Miss Malibu!

We are learning things that a family should NEVER have to go through. We were introduced to Chester today, this is a chest where they demonstrate and show us what a broviac central line is. Because this is a direct connection to her blood supply when we take her home they will teach us how to take care of it. During the surgery they will be putting in the broviac, this is so that they can draw labs, administer chemo and any other medications she may need without having to poke her every time. We obviously have a LOT to learn about this still.

Today Mallory has been a champ she pretty much slept through both the echocardiogram and the ultrasound, she had her little eyes half open and a silly little grin on her face the whole time. I am thankful that this little girl can still smile, giggle and be just such a joy to our lives and she has no idea of how sick she really is. We are thankful that she will hopefully never remember any of this agonizing process. This girl smiles even when our eyes are swelled up with tears, when are hearts are breaking for her she is giggling and cooing at us.

Our Little (but very BIG) Jillypie came up to see us today. We needed her hugs, kisses and stubborn "no's" today. That little girl is also a CHAMP! She is in her own world and for that we are thankful. Her life revolves around quoting the abc's (not in any specific order, right now "e" is her favorite!), taking naps and nothing to do with cancer. We are thankful that even for a few moments she takes our mind off of it and reminds us that we have to distract ourselves and still enjoy things even with all the bad things surrounding us currently. I don't believe that Jillian has ANY idea of what is going on, we could try to explain this to her but she still deserves to be a kid. We would like to keep her life as normal as possible for the circumstance. I am forever grateful for my mother and erika grala for taking her for us right now so we can focus all of our energy on Mallory right now.

I would like to state that "cancer sucks". It sucks worse than anyone could ever imagine. People have reached out to us from continents away, there are people that have contacted us that have children going through treatment and they have sent us nothing but encouragement and positive thoughts. These people amaze me, they have not let this run there lives, their children may be sick but they are just like any other family this is just a road bump. These people have shown me that it is possible to return to a "normal" life, it may not be the normal that we were used to but its a normal that we will get used to eventually. And as much as this journey is going to suck, we are not going to allow it to tear us apart, we will pull through this.